Ho Ho Ho

It was a very Christ-less Christmas in the club- as is to be expected. Lights and holly were hanging from railings (holly, not Holly... although that may have happened on a night I wasn't there). A lit tree stood proudly above the main stage from a balcony. And, ironically, nutcrackers stood at attention in random places. I haven't been back to work yet, since before the holiday, but yesterday's start to Kwanzaa's got me wondering whether or not any of the African American strippers will now be out for the week. At the end of one of my shifts last week I heard a white dancer announce to the dressing room that she was leaving and hoped everyone had a great "Christmas and Hanukkah," and then after a short pause, "And Kwanzaa!" Then, right on drunken, late-night, dressing room cue, a black girl jokingly and loudly rang back, "Yeah you better wish me a happy Kwanzaa, bitch!" Everyone laughed and went about their business. Just another day in the office.

Halloween Flashback of a Flash Dancer...

I'm surprised I failed to mention my favorite stripper Halloween costume in my Halloween entry. "Callie" was one of those funny, smart dancers with a plan to save money, invest it and then get out, which she successfully did- a rare exception. Today she's in school without debt and owns New York City real estate. It was she who dressed as a conjoined twin, and it was classic.

Complete with a cloth diaper, an oversized bib to just cover both breasts between each dance, a pacifier, bonnet, and stripper heels- the coup de grace, of course, was a small baby doll she strapped to the side of her head.  The stiff piece of plastic was the sad, deficient, disposable, conjoined twin, blinking with each dip and lean of her lap dances. She told me her friends said she wouldn't make money dressed like that, but she did.  There's always a demand for the witty stripper because the supply is low.